Dear ---------
Firstly I have to make very clear to you that I am not a psychiatrist or qualified psychologist. My experience has come from many years of observing my own behavior. The AA program is based on twelve steps, twelve traditions, twelve concepts. The program of recovery is based on the individuals ability to be honest with themselves. This is a lifetime commitment in applying the principals set down in the big book of Alcoholics anonymous. The program is very clear that it is voluntary and only makes suggestions based on experience that is shared as being part of a program of recovery. We only get back to the degree that we put into practicing certain principles in our own personnel recovery.
As in most twelve step programs that have adopted the 12 steps of AA, the recovery rate is only about 3 % .
Most of my ability in understanding human nature comes from many years of searching out and being honest about the things that have affected me personally in childhood and growing up in a dysfunctional environment. Many years of being influenced by people places and things had caused me to react to life mostly in negative terms. My anxieties, fears, and panic came from not being able to understand that other negative influences as well as my own caused me to loose touch with reality. This does not mean being insane! Over many years of self discovery and dealing with very painful memories did I realize that I was in many ways not totally at fault. I had to learn how to clear the path and come to terms with the past that caused me pain and suffering. To the degree that I wrote down the good the bad and the ugly did I feel less anxious. I had to make a ledger that was divided into two parts negative one side positive the other. Like I had told you about how fear is the corroding thread that touches almost every aspect of lives. Anger and resentments that we harbor is what blocks us from the sunlight of the spirit. Only to the degree that we rid ourselves from the wreckage of the past do we achieve peace of mind and serenity. I had to learn how to forgive myself first.
Its a simple process, however not easy but it can be done. keep it simple but be very honest with yourself about the challenge ahead. Take your time in writing down each discovery however painful it may be. Remember this a personal journey that you must take. You do not have to share this with anyone. You may keep your journal close or after reviewing a few times understanding what you have written and dealt with some of pain and forgiving yourself and others for the harm caused. You may decide to destroy what you have written. Its like a self confession on paper. The idea is to get it out of your system rather then let it roll around inside. If you feel the need to go back to review some of what you have written then do so. We are always left with little scares that will heal. The key is to not have any pain attached to the memories. To the degree that we climb over the wall of adversity and allow ourselves the pain and suffering do we find a degree of humility. Once over the wall we look back with a strong character being able to handle life's challenges on a daily basis without fear and understanding. This a short version of a lifetime of work that will never end. We must stay vigilante on a daily basis. That is why " one day at a time" is so true for all of us. Yesterday is gone tomorrow is not here however we have today to deal with. Thank you for the opportunity to help you as that is how I maintain my sobriety is in helping others.
serenity prayer
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change
courage to change things I can, and
wisdom to know the difference.
Maurice
